Conversation with Matt from 5 minutes ago at the gas station in someplace in Michigan:

Matt: I got you this French vanilla cappuccino, and if you don't like it I got you this.

Me: What if I do like the French vanilla?

Matt: Then you can have both.

Me: Okay, cause you made it sound like I could only have it if I hated the French vanilla (which we both know I like).

Matt: Nope, try it.

Me: (happily takes a sip knowing I can have both cups) Oh! It's pumpkin spice!

Matt: Stares at me like I'm dumb

Me: isn't it? (Hath my taste buds deceived me? Is that possible? Am I wrong? No!)

Matt: (Smiles) Yep, pumpkin spice!

Who the hell does that to someone?